In and Out of Consciousness

Sites of interest

2006-12-06T09:24:00.000-08:00

Babaji with pink roses by Karen C.

Had a few sites found lately of interest, one rated contemporary Guru's, and one not so contemporary) i found it useful and concurred concerning most I knew, but disagree about Catherine Ingram, altho I sat with her once only, I was not impressed with her.
Check out Peter's Pages
http://www.peter.ca/

also Steven Sashen had an interesting blog
http://sashen.com/blog/

sorry not linked, lazy today!

i got mad at my hindu philosophy professor while he was lecturing so i wrote this in notepad in response

2006-11-15T09:51:00.000-08:00

anirvacaniya - "cant explain it"
haha what bull shit.
ignorance in brahman?
there is one brahman, brahman is oneness, it is consciousness itself. consciousness does not have the capacity for ignorance. nor does it have the capacity for knowledge. consciousness does not have the capacity of differntiating between right/wrong, knowledge/ignorance, truth/false. consciouness only watches, only observes, utterly unaffected.

brahman is not a freaking circle. ignorance is not outside nor does it cover that circle. ignorance is only within the maya of brahman. maya and brahman are one anyways. ignorance, knowledge, all dualities are no longer dualities in brahman. there is only oneness. there is no from, neither is there formlessness. there is no knowledge, niether is there ignorance. there is only brahman. in the maya, all these work out. there is ignorance in maya since there is duality in maya. there is niether ignorance nor knowledege in brahman b/c there is non-duality in brahman. there is just brahman, no opposites.

brahman does not produce imperfection. the world, first of all, isnt imperfect. evil and good, dualities, create a type of perfection. just b/c there is suffering doesnt mean there is no perfection. jeez. just b/c u suffer doesnt mean the world is imperfect. maya is perfect, this creation is perfect, people are perfect, no matter what happens, no matter how they act. everything is perfect as it is. n00b. brahman does not produce, stupid professor, brahman just watches. maya produces, maya has evil in it, no one wants to say that, why fucking not?? its called expanded perspective. obviously maya has parts. maya has parts - good/evil, dualities, but it as a whole, a total, is one. maya comes from brahman. maya is brahman. maya is non-differnt from brahman. maya is a superimposition. nothign more. maya is like wetness of water. hahaa. go sri ramakrishna!

people like him are idiots. arguing against advaita, using dvaitic arguments against shankara.

"all vedantins have an achilles heel" - achilles heel - the boy was shot in the heel b/c it wasnt covered by the water of immortality when his mom dipped him in, so he died, even though he was immortal. "every assertion, fact, has an acchilles heel" - no it does. advaita does not have an acchilles heel, come talk to me, i will shoot u down. weakness?!? advaita does not have a weakness. there is fear, insecurity, doubt etc in anything dvaita. advaita transcends all this.

Shruti smriti purananamalayam karunalayam|
Namami Bhagavatpada sankaram lokasankaram||
I salute the compassionate abode of the Vedas, Smritis and Puranas known as Shankara Bhagavatpada (at the feet of the lord), who makes the world auspicious.

go adi shankara, u are the man of men, u are the original awesome advaitin cuz u rock.

my hindu phil teacher is a n00b. not a newbie - b/c that means its tolerable. n00b.

Try

2006-10-16T05:34:00.000-07:00

Try as we might to become one..Impossible!
We were Never more!

SS

Avasa

2006-10-10T01:22:00.000-07:00

The recognition that there is no seeker brings an end to the seeking process. It is seen that there is no one to become enlightened, therefore there is no such thing as enlightenment. This recognition IS Enlightenment. Emptiness has seen that there is only Emptiness, nothing has been found but the realisation has taken place that nothing was ever lost.
With Love Avasa

just like the One

2006-10-09T20:00:00.000-07:00

I say no smoking, and what shows, up? A smokin Guru!!

Hope you keep your keyboard in tact Avasa, to go along with your newly replaced printer from one that Shakti blew up. Once a gaff, always a gaff, huh? Ya Gotta watch those blonde Italians, they'll take ya for a ride,,make you believe they gaffed up, when it was that old ploy all along to keep you doing your own work! thank you for the laughs!!!

spiritual ego

2006-10-09T13:36:00.000-07:00

Avasa
In the beingness felt in a topsy turvy climate of the spiritual ego…these words resound, … getting caught up in the craziness that is manifesting around our body/minds as situations and circumstances, is way to easy, and ultimately, the funniness being that it is only Consciousness itSelf that is creating this turmoil so that it can see itSelf - so that in a moment of complete exasperation/anger/frustration and unchosen surrender the attention of the mind may shift from the noisy anarchic outside movement of the world to what is seeing it. Experience has it that in the moment reaction arises and no counter reaction is engaged … in that spaceless space where Silence resides, is where the subtle movement occurs from outside to inside. Eventually as the seeing deepens the separation of outside and inside cannot be found, and it is here that Love lives us from.

Being gentle is a choiceless choice when the unlimited beauty of One is seen as its own infinite treasure…. Our true nature …
OmniOneLove
t

A little something to contemplate.

2006-10-09T04:05:00.000-07:00

There are moments in Life when what we have been seeking to achieve in the world fails. From a spiritual point of view this is the greatest opportunity for the turning about of attention from the outer to the inner. This inward turning is the beginning of the journey back to the Source. In our outer failure we have a real possibility to find that which is true success, the recognition of our Being.
Avasa

A wasted Life

2006-10-09T02:01:00.000-07:00

I am sure that everyone has at sometime or another felt that they are living a wasted Life. I know that I used to feel this way from time to time in between distractions.
The thing is this is not a good feeling and it can create a collapse of the energy to live Life fully but at the same time it is such a simple thing to go beyond. First of all it arises from a feeling that there is something to attain in Life and if one buys into this the thought arises. If we remain with the thought and let it ponit to the feeling that gives rise to it we will see that there is a sense of lack present, it is this feeling of lacking something that creates the seeking for other than what IS and this is a refusal to be present. The fact is that we ARE present and so is the thought or feeling.
At the level of the thought nothing will change, it will repeat again and again until it becomes chronic pattern which finally leaves the body in a state of withdrawl from Life. In oreder to bring an end to the thought pattern all we need do is rest our attention at the level of the percept and SEE the felling, feeling it fully without buying into it. If we do this we will find that at some moment the feeling no longer gives rise to the accompanying thought and the energy that created this contraction in the body releases. Once this release takes place the energy naturally goes into the play of radiance as when we were a child, prior to conditioning, and we find ourself without effort being drawn into the play of Life with a joy again.
When this way of Life returns it is not maintained by effort but by the joy of existence being aware of itself and the gratefulness for having a human form to experience Life with is felt fully. The thought about whether or not Life is being wasted no longer arises. Lif eis what lives Life, it is Life its Self that lives AS and THROUGH these forms and Life never wastes its Self for it is simply expressing itself, going nowhere, getting nowhere just expressing.
If the thought ! Am I (or I am) wasting my Life " arises do not try to answer it with another set of thoughts but go into the feeling of it and see what happens. Have no prior expectation or intention and let the feeling unfold its secret to you , I feel that you will be pleasantly suprised at what takes place.
Much Love avasa

In and Out of Consciousness

2006-10-09T00:22:00.000-07:00

In and Out of Consciousness: "October
It is interesting how when we begin to see thing in a different way from the crowd we are often seen as a pain in the arse.
I have noticed even in so-called spiritual circles how the apparent seperate individuals either dare not step outside the group agreed consciousnesss or they try to laud it over everyone else, there never quite seems to be an inbetween where the stepping out, which is going deeper,and the sharing of it is done with no intention to be better than the others or not wanting to appear as if one is trying to do that.
Often what we have seen and then wants tt be shared is held back fo rfear of not being accepted by the group or the struggling through that makes what we share come out as unecessarily forceful so that it appears in its expression as offensive to the others. I am sure of we look into this we will find that this is something that we all hold in consciousness at some period in our unfolding understanding. If we can SEE this clearly and still share what we feel that has been for us something very beautiful to come across then we will find that it will be shared in a way that, it will be received, with response, even if initially there is resistance. The reason that this is received is because when ther eis no fear of being rejected by the group and one is not struggling to overcome this fear of rejection by pushing what is shared forcefully it is happening natuirally and without intention. What is natural is loving and Love is always fianlly received in the Heart wher ewhat is shared is not just understood as an intellectual concept or felt and recognised intuitively but is fully balanced by both of these and is SEEN.
There is actually no intention when what is shared is just the perfume of Truth arising, the flower emits its scent as an expression of the beauty it expresses for its joy for existing, not because it wishes to attract the bees and other insects that will propagate its pollen, that is secondary.
Once we have seen through this fear of stepping outside the sheep consciousness our realisations will naturally be shared AND received because they are actions of Love joyfully wanting all to enjoy what has been SEEN.
Observe whenyou have intuitively understood something how th ejoy and th esense of relase it brings wants to be shared and how quickly the fear of it not bein accepted arises and I feel that you may begin to see the initial pro mpting is coming from Love.The mind's reasons for sharing arrive afterwards. Once this mental structure is seen it begins to fall apart and one will eventually, when it is fully collapsed, find that all that is realsied will be shared spontaneously without thinking about it beforehand and the freshness of it sperfume will accompany the words and feelings that are imparted.
Love to you all Avasa

In and Out of Consciousness: In and Out of Consciousness

2006-10-08T16:21:00.000-07:00

In and Out of Consciousness: In and Out of Consciousness
IT seems strange these days to find myself sharing something that everyone should be able to see without help from anyone and in one sense I see they everyone does see it but they dont know that. I kno wthat sound weird but that is how it is, we ALL know this and yet!!!?
In order to arrive at this realisation the first thing that we need to accept is that what we are looking for is what is doing the looking, this is also the last thing that we accept. From the very begining in this enquiry this fact is accepted. Clearly the Truth that we seek must be already present or it would not be the Truth for Truth is that out of which everything has been made manifest so what appears as our world must therefore be the body of Truth, hence it is everywhere and everything. There is not anything that is not the manifestation of this and so this is therefore you as it is all else.
The body is the manifest form of this and the mind is this also in its subtle manifestation and what sees these is this. As you can see the form and the thoughts and feelings that are the mind you cannot be these so if your attention is drawn away from them that leaves only One thing that you could possibly be and that is the Awareness that is seeing them.
This pure Awareness is what you are and you always only this. You know that you are aware. How do you know this ? because you are aware of the fact that you are aware. Simply, when you remember, be aware of the presence of this Awareness and all else will take place naturally.
Avasa

In and Out of Consciousness

2006-10-08T15:42:00.000-07:00

In and Out of Consciousness
I have my shoes off already and the only smoke here is the wisp coming up from my keyboard.
How does this blog thing work then ?
Seems like a NICE place LOL
Avasa

Avasa is joining our blog

2006-10-08T14:11:00.000-07:00

After an interesting experiment with Satsang on Om...we have decided to try this for some Satsang, All are welcome here who will take their shoes off, of course, no smoking anywhere here. lol

Appreciate some respect, as of home environment.
Welcome as long as you sense a respectful reason to be here.

where i got my creative outpouring from

2006-09-12T12:34:00.000-07:00

"The significance of Mother worship to a real sadhaka (spiritual aspirant) is to feel that he and his universe are nothing but media for the manifestation of one all-pervading Power - the Power of God (Maya), the Power that is one with God. Not merely to understand intellectually, but to realize in each and every one of his cells that he lives and moves and has his being in the divine Power that is both immanent and transcendent. All spiritual endeavors of a true devotee of Shakti aim at the realization that his self, including his body, mind and spirit, is an instrument through which the great Mother produces the song of life - a song infinitely varies in tunes and melodies."

-Great Women Of India, pp. 79-80.
-Quoted in the book Kali, The Black Goddess of Dakshineswar

a creative outpouring

2006-09-09T18:30:00.000-07:00

ya... i remember reading that this was a site for a creative outpouring. i realized that i randomly had one of those on dailyom, so im just gnna cut and paste it here.

the point of shakti worship, is to realize that maya is all and that maya does everything and that the worshipper is nothing but maya's play, maya itself, everything is maya, the worshipper is part of maya, does not have a will of his own; and this is TRUE! but then the vedantin would say, why try for that? why not realize that our true self-nature is brahman itself!! and then the shakti worshipper would say, oh man, where is the bhakti in your life? i love Ma... my divine mother is maya itself. i have realized what u have realized but i have added the wine of divine love in my life and now i reel about intoxicated! you just remain in the dry bliss of knowledge.

i'll add where i got it from later.. kali's book is in my dorm room, and im at home right now.

Hooponopono as a path

2006-08-12T14:34:00.000-07:00

One Forgiveness

Bascially my understanding of ho'oponopono, the 3 phrases are:

1. Forgive me
acknowledge thoughts, feelings of all.
( and that includes all family, ancestors, etc, so thats everybody), and it means forgive us for all memories we react to that are in our collective consciousness.
In other words, we take our thoughts to be real, but we are only reacting to memories, held in collective consciousness. we want to have them erased by the divine void.

So we ask forgiveness, and say
2. Thank you..
for erasing these memories that we then react to.
(our part is asking forgiveness, and the divine erases) And I personally feel I have to trust that even if I am still having a lot of thoughts that the calming is going somewhere necessary.
( this particualr aspect for me, stops mind from meddling as much)

One Spirit...

3. I love you,

which expresses that I prefer that peaceful void, and love over all these memories that rise and fall,
(and create conflict) and desire experiencing love, peace, God, divinity, void, more than memories and thoughts. ( and reactions to these)

So you can simply repeat all three phrases or elaborate I guess. I do both.

One Cleansing

Not enough, but i will do better.. This is my understanding...of hooponopono, we each take 100% responsibility , I suppose because we are one. You work on yourself and all others benefit.
Forgive me
Thank you,
I love you

Oh and the way I understand feelings/ thoughts is we are to acknowledge them, and be thank ful they come up to "be erased."

We can't suppress them, we must acknowledge them, and do hooponopono.

One Perfect World

Dance of Universal Peace in American Falls Idaho

2006-06-30T20:59:00.000-07:00

Dance of Universal Peace in Idaho last weekend on the Snake River

Dances of Universal Peace find a dance site

Pyhllis, a dear dear sweet woman, and such a stylish dresser!!!
I love love her squaw boots and colors in her dress...hi Phyllis!

Pamela in front resting, and Bakti, Linda and Judy...

Dancing on Sunday under an awning

Phyllis again, under her umbrella with Snake River behind her..

Crete drums and sings:

More dancing on Sunday morning:

Pamela again:

We stayed in tents, and sleeping bags, etc.

The Home of John and Crete on the Snake River, wonderful host's..

We raised Crete's and John's TeePee. About 26 poles, and how many of us? In the hot sun, it was beautiful!

Down to the Nitty Gritty

2006-04-27T10:10:00.000-07:00

The worst pollution to the body is bad thoughts, and the worst thought is, " I am the body." Papaji in, This.

This

2006-04-26T12:56:00.000-07:00

Papaji said in, This," Avoid thinking, and avoid not thinking. What is between these two?"

He said,"How to stop thinking? by Being! When you think, you are an object, a person, a body, or some idea, but by Being there is nothing. Just Being.

To become something you must meditate and perform some mantra, ritual or practice. Just to Be is simple. Without Being, you can't do any practice."

"Do not accept anything, and do not reject anything. Allow the quietness, and allow the mind to go and to enjoy itself. The difference is that you are not the enjoyer."

Papaji from his book, This.

Pure Advaita - Description of the Lord

2006-04-14T11:10:00.000-07:00

hey guys, what im about to post right now... its gnna blow u all far far away. far away into the world of pure advaita vedanta. o man... just thinking about it gives me shivers and goosebumps. alrite, this excerpt, which u guys are about to read, is from a quaintly large books called: Yoga Vasistha. its one of those really really crazy awesome books, cuz its so incredibly hardcore in its approach to Truth. u know... it starts off nice, with a relative perspective, then moves on almost immeditately to an absolute perspective. what i mean by relative is like... the concept of jiva, the ego, mind, the concept of karma. for an absolute perspective its gnna be like: there is no such thing as karma, no such thing as liberation or bondange, no such thing as jiva or ishvara, there is only one Atma. check it:

DESCRIPTION OF THE LORD

VASISTHA SAID: "... Pray enlighten me. What is the method of worshipping the Lord which destroys all sins and promotes all auspiciousness?"

SIVA SAID: "Do you know who 'god' is? God is not Visnu, Siva or Brahma (or christ or allah etc etc); not the wind, the sun or the moon; not the priest (brahmana) or the king; not I nor you; not ego or the mind. God is without form and undivided; that splendour which is not made and which has neither beginning nor end is known as god or lord Siva which is pure consciousness. That alone is to be worshipped; and that alone is all.

If one is unable to worship this Siva then he is encouraged to worship the form. The latter yields finite results but the former bestows infinite bliss. He who ignores the infinite and is devoted to the finite abandons a diamond and seeks a peanut. However, the realized sages sometimes worship a form playfully.

Now for the articles used in the worship: wisdom*[1], self-control and the perception of the self*[2] in all beings are the foremost among those articles. The self alone is lord Siva who is fit to be worshipped at all times with the flowers of wisdom."

VASISTHA SAID: "Pray tell me how this world is transmuted into pure consciousness (Brahman) and also how that pure consciousness appears as this material world and embodied soul (jiva)."

SIVA SAID: "Indeed only that cid-akasa (the infinite consciousness), which alone exists even after the cosmic dissolution, exists even now, utterly devoid of objectivity. The concepts and the notions that are illumined by the consciousness within itself shine as this creation, on account of the movement of energy within consciousness, precisely as dreams arise during sleep. Otherwise, it is totally impossible for an object of preception to exist outside of the omnipresent infinite consciousness.

All these mountains, the whole world, the firmament, the self, the jiva or the individuality (ego) and all the elements of which this world is constituted - all these are naught but pure consciousness. Before the so-called creation when only this pure consciousness existed, where were all these (heaven, etc.)? Space (akasa), supreme or infinite consciousness - are mere words and they indicate the same truth even as synonyms do. Even as the duality experienced in dream is illusory, the duality implied in this creation of the world is also illusory. Even as the objects seem to exist and function in the inner world of consciousness in a dream, objects seem to exist and function in the other world of consciousness during the wakeful state. Nothing really happens in both these states. Even as consciousness alone is the reality in the dream state, consciousness alone is the substance of the wakeful state too. That is the Lord, that is the supreme truth, that you are, that I am and that is all."

SIVA CONTINUED: "Worship of that Lord is true worship. He is undivided and indivisible, non-dual and not fashioned or created by activity (by mind); he is not attained by external efforts. His adoration is the fountain-source of joy.

The external worship of a form is prescribed only for those whose intelligence has not been awakened and who are immature like little boys. When one does not have self-control, wisdom, etc., he uses flowers in worship (placing flowers at Dieties' feet); such worship is futile, even as adoring the self in an external form is futile. However, these immature devotees derive satisfaction by worshipping an object created by themselves; they may even earn worthless rewards from such worship."

SIVA CONTINUED: "I shall now describe to you the mode of worship appropriate to enlightened people like you. The Lord fit to be worshipped is indeed the one who upholds the entire creation, who is beyond thought and description, who is beyond concepts of even the 'all' and the 'collective totality'. He alone is referred to as 'God' who is undivided and indivisible by space and time, whose light illumines all the objects, who is pure and absolute consciousness. He is that intelligence which is beyond all parts, which is hidden in all that is, which is the being in all that is and which robs all that is of their being (i.e., which veils the truth - (MAYA!!)). This Brahman is in the middle of being, it is God, and the truth that is indicated as 'OM'. It exists everywhere like the essence in a plant. That pure consciousness which is in you, in me and in all the gods and goddesses alone is God. O Holy Sage, even the other gods endowed with form are indeed nothing but that pure consciousness. The entire universe is pure consciousness. That is God, that 'all' I am, that is you; everything is attained from and through him."

SIVA CONTINUED: "That God is not distant from anyone, O Holy sage, nor is he difficult to attain: he is forever seated in the body and he is everywhere like space. He does everything, he eats, he holds everything togthers, he goes, he breathes, he knows every limb of the body. He is the light in which all these limbs function and all the diverse activities take place. He dwells in the cave of one's own heart. He transcends the mind and the five senses of cognition; therefore he cannot be comprehended nor described by them - yet for the purpose of instruction he is indicated as 'consciousness'. Hence, though it appears as though he does everything, he does nothing. That consciousness is pure and seemingly engages itself in the activites of the world to the same extent as the spring does in flowering trees."

SIVA CONTINUED: "Somewhere this consciousness functions as space, somewhere as a jiva (embodied self), somewhere as action, somewhere as substance and so forth, but without intending to do so. Even as all the 'different' oceans are but one indivisible mass of water, this consciousness, though described in different ways, is but one cosmic mass of consciousness. In the body, which is like a lotus, it is the same consciousness that imbibes the experience which is like honey gathered by the restless mind which is like the bee. In this universe all these various beings (the gods, the demons, the mountains, the oceans and so forth) flow within the infinite consciousness even as eddies and whirlpools appear in the ocean. Even the wheel of ignorance, which causes the wheel of life and death to revolve, revolves within this cosmic consciousness whose energy is in constant motion.

It was consciousness, in the form of the four-armed Visnu, that destroyed the demons, even as a thunderstorm equipped with the rainbow quenches the heat that rises from the earth. It is consciousness alone which takes the form of Siva and Parvati, of Brahma the creator and the numerous other beings. This consciousness is like a mirror which holds a reflection within itself, as it were, without undergoing any modification thereby. Without undergoing any modification in itself, this consciousness appears as all these countless beings in this universe."

SIVA CONTINUED: "The infinite consciousness is like a creeper. It is sprinkled with the latent tendencies of countless jivas. Desires are the buds. Past creations are the filaments. The sentient and the insentient beings are parts of the creeper. The one appears as many, but it has not become many.

It is by this infinite consciousness that all this is thought of, expressed and done. It is the infinite consciousness which appears as the bodies which are in fact inert and which come into contact with one another and derive various experiences. This consciousness is like the typhoon which is unseen in itself but in which sand-particles and dust rise and dance as if by themselves. This consciousness casts a shadow in itself, as it were and that is regarded as tamas (or the guna of darkness, inertia).

In this body, thoughts and notions generate action in the light of this very consciousness. Surely, but for this consciousness even an object which is immediately in front of oneself cannot be experienced. This body cannot function nor exist but for this consciousness. It grows, it falls, it eats, etc. This consciousness creates and maintains all the movable and the immovable beings in the universe. The infinite consciousness alone exists, naught else exists. Consciousness alone has arisen in consciousness."

(theres more where that came from)

Sri Aurobindo.... This resonates with me

2006-04-08T16:06:00.000-07:00

"This understanding is not to be gained by reasoning, not by tapasya, nor by much learning, but whom This Self chooses To him it reveals it's own body".

Well, that is the same thing as what we call divine grace,- it is an action from above or from within independent of mental causes which decides it's own movement. We can call it divine grace, we can call it the Self within choosing it's own hour and way to manifest to the mental instrument on the surface : we can call it the flowering of the inner being or inner nature to self realization and self knowledge. As something in us approaches it or as it presents itself to us, so the mind sees it. But in reality it is the same Thing and the same process of the being in nature.

From Sri Aurobindo, Growing Within

THE FIVE SKANDHAS

2006-04-05T22:31:00.000-07:00

http://www.american-buddha.com/five.skandhas.trungp.htm

by Chogyam Trungpa

To understand more precisely the process of confirming the solidity of I and other, that is, the development of ego, it is helpful to be familiar with the five skandhas, a set of Buddhist concepts which describe ego a five-step process.

The first step or skandha, the birth of ego, is called "form" or basic ignorance. We ignore the open, fluid, and intelligent quality of space. When a gap or space occurs in our experience of mind, when there is a sudden glimpse of awareness openness, absence of self, then a suspicion arise: "Suppose I find that there is no solid me? That possibility scares me. I don't want to go into that. That abstract paranoia, the discomfort that something may be wrong, is the source of karmic chain reactions. It is the fear of ultimate confusion and despair. The fear of the absence of the self, of the egoless state, is a constant threat to us. "Suppose it is true, what then? I am afraid to look." We want to maintain some solidity but the only material available with which to work is space, the absence of ego, so we try to solidify or freeze that experience of space. Ignorance in this case is not stupidity, but it is a kind of stubbornness. Suddenly we are bewildered by the discovery of selflessness and do not want to accept it; we want to hold on to something.

Then the next step is the attempt to find a way of occupying ourselves, diverting our attention from our aloneness. The karmic chain reaction begins. Karma is dependent upon the relativity of this and that--my existence and my projections--and karma is continually reborn as we continually try to busy ourselves. In other words, there is a fear of not being confirmed by our projections. One must constantly try to prove that one does exist by feeling one's projections as a solid thing. Feeling the solidity of something seemingly outside you reassures you that you are a solid entity as well. This is the second skandha, "feeling."
In the third stage, ego develops three strategies or impulses with which to relate to its projections: indifference, passion and aggression. These impulses are guided by perception. Perception, in this case, is the self-conscious feeling that you must officially report back to central headquarters what is happening in any given moment. Then you can manipulate each situation by organizing another strategy.

In the strategy of indifference, we numb any sensitive areas that we want to avoid, that we think might hurt us. We put on a suit of armor. The second strategy is passion--trying to grasp things and eat them up. It is a magnetizing process. Usually we do not grasp if we feel rich enough. But whenever there is a feeling of poverty, hunger, impotence, then we reach out, we extend our tentacles and attempt to hold onto something. Aggression, the third strategy, is also based on the experience of poverty, the feeling that you cannot survive and therefore must ward off anything that threatens your property or food. Moreover, the more aware you are of the possibilities of being threatened, the more desperate your reaction becomes. You try to run faster and faster in order to find a way of feeding or defending yourself. This speeding about is a form of aggression. Aggression, passion, indifference are part of the third skandha, "perception/impulse."

Ignorance, feeling, impulse and perception--all are instinctive processes. We operate a radar system which senses our territory. Yet we cannot establish ego properly without intellect, without the ability to conceptualize and name. Since we have so many things happening, we begin to categorize them, putting them into certain pigeon-holes, naming them. We make it official, so to speak. So "intellect" or "concept" is the next stage of ego, the fourth skandha, but even this is not quite enough. We need a very active and efficient mechanism to keep the instinctive and intellectual processes of ego coordinated. That is the last development of ego, the fifth skandha, "consciousness."

Consciousness consists of emotions and irregular thought patterns, all of which taken together form the different fantasy worlds with which we occupy ourselves. These fantasy worlds are referred to in the scriptures as the "six realms". The emotions are the highlights of ego, the generals of ego's army; subconscious thought, day-dreams and other thoughts connect one highlight to another. So thoughts form ego's army and are constantly in motion, constantly busy. Our thoughts are neurotic in the sense that they irregular, changing direction all the time and overlapping one another. We continually jump from one thought to the next, from spiritual thoughts to sexual fantasies to money matters to domestic thoughts and so on. The whole development of the five skandhas--ignorance/form, feeling, impulse/perception, concept and consciousness--is an attempt on our part to shield ourselves from the truth of our insubstantiality.

The practice of meditation is to see the transparency of this shield. But we cannot immediately start dealing with the basic ignorance itself; that would be like trying to push a wall down all at once. If we want to take this wall down, we must take it down brick by brick; we start with immediately available material, a stepping stone. So the practice of meditation starts with the emotions and thoughts, particularly with the thought process.

Yogananda meets his Guru - pure love

2006-03-30T12:53:00.000-08:00

okay dudes. heres an excerpt from Paramahamsa Yogananda's Autobiography of a Yogi

its freaking awesome. heres some background - so yogananda is was doing his errands, unhappily situated at some random hermitage...

{Ater ten minutes of walking, I felt a heavy numbness in my feet. As though turned to stone, they were unable to carry me farther. Laboriously I turned around; my feet regained normalcy. I faced the opposite direction; again the curious weight oppressed me.

"The saint is magnetically drawing me to him! (he'd seen him b4 by the way)." With this thought, I heaped my parcels into the arms of Habu. He had been observing my erratic footwork with amazement, and now burst into laughter.

"What ails you? Are you crazy?"

My tumultuous emotion prevented any retort; I sped silently away.

Retracing my steps as though wing-shod, I reached the narrow lane (where he'd seen him b4). My quick glance revealed the quite figure, steadily gazing in my direction. A few eager steps and I was at his feet.

"Gurudeva!" (Divine teacher, Master) The divine face was none other than he of my thousand visions. These halcyon eyes, in leonine head with pointed beard and flowing locks, had oft peered through the gloom of my nocturnal reveries, holding a promise I had not fully understood.

"O my own, you have come to me!" My guru uttered the words again and again in Bengali, his voice tremulous with joy. "How many years I have waited for you!"

We entered a oneness of silence; words seemed the rankest superfluities. Eloquence flowed in soundless chant from heart of master to disciple. With an antenna of irrefragable insight I sensed that my guru knew God, and would lead me to Him. The obscuration of this life disappeared in a fragile dawn of prenatal memories. Dramatic time! Past, present, and future are its cycling scenes. This was not the first sun to find me at these holy feet!

My hand in his, my guru led me to his temporary residence in the Rana mahal section of the city. His athletic figure moved with firm tread. Tall, erect, about fifty five at this time, he was active and vigorous as a young man. His dark eyes were large, beautiful with plumbless wisdom. Slightly curly hair softened a face of striking power. Strength mingled subtly with gentleness.

As we made our way to the stone balcony of a house overlooking the Ganges, he said affectionately: "I will give you my hermitages and all I possess."

"Sir, I come for wisdom and god-contact. Those are your treasure-troves I am after!"

The swift Indian twilight had dropped its half curtains before my master spoke again. His eyes held unfathomable tenderness.

"I give you my unconditional love"

Precious words! A quarter-century elapsed before I had another auricular proof of his love. His lips were strange to ardor; silence became his oceanic heart.

"Will you give me the same unconditional love?" he gazed at me with childlike trust.

"I will love you eternally, Gurudeva!"

"Ordinary love is selfish, darkly rooted in desires and satisfactions. Divine love is without condition, without boundary, without change. The flux of the human heart is gone forever at the transfixing touch of pure love." He added humbly, "If ever you find me falling from a state of God-realization, please promise to put my head on your lap and help to bring me back to the Cosmic Beloved we both worship." }

Satsang links to Nirmala (online video satsang) Gina Lake

2006-03-27T20:35:00.000-08:00

Nirmala Satsang

Nirmala offers video Satsang here online. There are several, and he is very clear and understands so much of what I inquire into.

I spoke with him this morning when I called to make an appointment with Gina, he was very generous with his time, and talking with me and I felt a great relief in just speaking with him, personally. He clarified the conscious will it requires to be present, which was confusing me because of different teachings I had heard, mixed with my own naive experience years ago.

And we were just getting to talk of my old, "technique," and he said using an old technique can be like reusing an old Kleenex...and there we had to stop because he had an appointment. I think, that now I do have a clarity, and now just need the conscious will to do this, which would have been my next question, how does one muster the will?

We discussed what to do when it seems a thousand tennis balls are coming at once as I said, and he said it was just to watch the overwhelm. We discussed the mind as I have noticed, telling me how I feel, but when I look for the feeling in my body, often, so often, no such feeling exists.

Nirmala told me of a part in the movie, A beautiful Mind where Russell Crow asks someone if that can see a person he thinks he sees, but is unsure because he hallucinates, and when he was told , "yes." he says to this person, "I can talk to you then." I loved this, because I need a reality check so often, with all the mind stuff that has been hitting me.

We also discussed the fact that there are no mistakes, because we are eternal beings, we have all the time there is to get where we are going. I experienced this many years ago and I know it's true, but it is true for me as a memory, not my current experience. He said that is better than not at all.

I am blessed by talking with Nirmala for 5 minutes, it was not too much, for me, or too little. Short is very sweet, it isn't overwhelming. I can put it to use. Perfect, like a shared slice of flan, to be savored, and blissfully delicious. It has been a wonderful beginning to a day for me. Thank you Nirmala.

Nirmala does one on one Satsang over the phone, as well. His site has free downloads, which are a blessing, and a generosity.

He is going to Victoria this weekend, and I think I may just go there to be in Satsang with him since I didn't attend his Satsangs here the past few years.

I just found this site of Gina's. Gina is Nirmala's wife, and her e-book, Radical Happiness, addresses; happiness, suffering, and life. Gina Lake
Free chapter of her e-book.
These excerpts from Gina's book are very light and clear. You can read an entire chapter for free. Take a look.

She does astrology readings and also channeling Theo, a collective consciousness on the mid-causal plane.

Tulips Sherry M Stewart 2005

The Swan

2006-03-22T22:37:00.000-08:00

A swan is said to have a sensitive beak that enables it to distinguish pure milk from a mixture of milk and water. A swan, therefore, symbolizes the power of discrimination, or the ability to discriminate between right and wrong or good and bad. Saraswati uses the swan as Her carrier. This indicates that one must acquire and apply knowledge with discrimination for the good of mankind. Knowledge that is dominated by ego can destroy the world.
The Abbreviated Bhagavad-Gita
International Gita Society
sikh net radio and links to The Adi Granth

Swan Sherry M Stewart 2006

Live more abundantly

2006-03-20T09:54:00.000-08:00

This link I found this morning because Lynn posted it on Om.
I had to include it here for others to look into as I myself delve into it.
Live more abundantly
and my thanks to my friends today, and to Louise Hay for her book, You can heal your life.
And for the miracle it showed up in the first place here when I thought it was packed away.
AND that it was recommended to me about a week or so ago by a friend.

Of course, it was something I realized was being pointed out to me.

Washington Pass and Larches
Photo
Sherry M Stewart 2005

First Attempt

2006-03-16T12:43:00.000-08:00

There once was a young man named Grover
Who craved to find a four leaf clover.
He searched high and low,
Above and below;
Wised up, gathered sage for his lover.

Here's a second version I also posted on our local political activist blog, Keep Leucadia Funky, at leucadia.blogspot.com. Traditionally limericks are humorous, slightly ribald, so I'm still thinking along those lines. Happy St. Patrick's Day, friends!~~~~~~~~~~~~

There once was a scared man named Grover
Who sought to find a four leaf clover;
He searched high and low,
Above and below;
Wised up, grew sage, will not roll over.

Encapsulated

2006-03-15T15:56:00.000-08:00

Taking time this morning to express the welling up of angst in my heart, my bereavement, and the painfulness encapsulated within...using 7 words, 17 syllables, a haiku, got me in touch with what I was experiencing when I was dragging my feet about confronting this, heart break.

Well, ok, my heels were dug firmly in the ground!

I admit it.

How wonderful I Am that I made this point of exploring my feelings. For in that act of embracing, I was freed from all my angst. It has been ongoing and great.

I have tried to be such a good sport.

I rode the wave today, it was intoxicating.

Sadness is real, heart break, disappointment are real, and these so called negatives are part of life to be embraced. When accepted rather than denied the muse sings her appointed song, and in that singing, dissolves into ecstacy of finding and embracing the true self.

There is a tendency for people to view sorrowful expressions as disdainful and unacceptable, as negative.

What is negative is criticism of another, judgment..that is all, and self criticism, and unacceptance.

When you find fault, it is in you, a resistance of your own self projected onto another, a sense that you are not acceptable.

Riding the wave for me today came in writing these few words that clued me in to what I had been doing to myself, and I knew how I had been afraid to express my sorrowful heart, for fear of being set at naught, and now I don't care, for I am completely free. ( as Byron Kathy says, "other's opinions are their business")

I know that all criticisms come from the self criticism we carry inside. I want to be free and have everyone free.

Thom once said that I had been through a katrina and The Tsunami, and more, and not to let anyone try to tell me different, that it changes me, and I would never be the same, yet I was only too willing to suppress my expression that would result in freedom for fear of dismissal by others, for far too many people have been harsh with me. Low and behold it is their own harshness with their own selves, being in a state of non acceptance, where freedom can never be found..

This is the small truth that freed me:

My soft heart speared
Unendurable aching
Encapsulated

With these few words, expressions, I saw my whole self, and then I was free. it was the last word that got me, " Encapsulated."

ShiningDawn proposed we all write a limerick for St. patricks Day!

2006-03-15T01:07:00.000-08:00

limerick handbook

I must be able to write a bad limerick...what should the topic be?
Please, everyone, member or no, make a limerick for St. Paddy.

Eclipse

2006-03-14T13:34:00.000-08:00

Leto's granddaughters
hide
the moon
dancing darkness
across the sky
binding their breasts
loosening their hair
homage to the Huntress
Soul sister

Laughter lighting the stars.

--Pamela Dawn

Remembering Someone Departed

2006-03-14T00:46:00.000-08:00

Sent to Ise, in condolence for the loss of her child.

Beside my feelings
Speech pales
And so
To say how I feel for you
I have no words at all.

omoFu yori
iFu Fa oroka ni
narinureba
tatoFete iFan
koto no Fa zo naki

Taira no Sadafun (d. 923)

Waka for Japan

Friendship - Rebirth - Scarab - Transformation - Inspiration

2006-03-13T21:32:00.000-08:00

© 1995-2004, Rob Brezsny. All rights reserved.
http://www.freewillastrology.com/horoscopes/virgo.html

Virgo Horoscope for week of March 9, 2006 (Thursday to Thursday)

The ancient Greeks had words for love that transcend our usual notions, writes Lindsay Swope in her review of Richard Idemon's book Through the Looking Glass. Epithemia is the basic need to touch and be touched. Our closest approximation is "horniness," though epithemia is not so much a sexual feeling as a sensual one. Philia is friendship. It includes the need to admire and respect your friends as a reflection of yourself--like in high school, where you want to hang out with the cool kids because that means you're cool too. Eros isn't sexual in the way we usually think, but is more about the emotional gratification that comes from merging souls. Agape is a mature, utterly free expression of love that has no possessiveness. It means wanting the best for another person even if it doesn't advance one's self-interest. The phase you're currently in, Virgo, is providing you with opportunities to explore the frontiers of at least three of these kinds of love.

Aquarius Horoscope for week of March 9, 2006

After taking inventory of the astrological factors coming to bear on you the past eight years, I've decided you're ready to leap to the next octave of your evolution. Therefore, I'll tell you a truth that was articulated by the powerful activist Mahatma Gandhi. It was instrumental in his success at leading millions of Indians to overthrow British oppression. I hope that his demanding, controversial advice will play a central role in shaping your destiny for the next eight years. But beware: It will only work if you're a brave rebel who relentlessly resists the conventional wisdom. Gandhi: "Every moment of your life is infinitely creative and the universe is endlessly bountiful. Just put forth a clear enough request, and everything your heart desires must come to you."

Aries Horoscope for week of March 9, 2006

Dung beetles were considered sacred and lucky by the ancient Egyptians. In fact, the seemingly lowly insect, also known as a scarab, was worshiped as a symbol of transformation and resurrection, in part because it derives its nourishment from the waste matter of other animals. Since it also pushes balls of dung to its nest, it was thought to resemble the god Ra rolling the sun through the heavens. During the coming week, Aries, the scarab will be your power animal. May it inspire you to turn crap into treasure as you're reborn from the deadness of the past.

Pisces Horoscope for week of March 9, 2006

I've been present during the births of two children, Jasmine and Zoe. Both experiences were daunting, explosive, and ecstatic. Nothing else that has ever happened to me has rivaled the role they played in awakening my reverence for life. The gratitude and love that overflowed in me then will always remain a source of inspiration. If you choose to respond to the invitations the cosmos is now making available to you, Pisces, you will soon be visited by events that evoke comparable feelings.

Living Life With Passion

2006-03-13T20:19:00.000-08:00

So very sad to learn of Ravi's loss. His friend was so very young to have died and Ravi so very young to experience such a great loss. Your post, Lynn, reminds me of two poems:

To Virgins to Make Much of Time
by Robert Herrick (1591-1674)

Gather ye rosebuds while ye may,
 Old Time is still a-flying;
And this same flower that smiles today,
 To-morrow will be dying.

The glorious lamp of heaven, the Sun,
 The higher he's a-getting;
The sooner will his race be run,
 And nearer he's to setting.

That age is best, which is the first,
 When youth and blood are warmer;
But being spent, the worse, and worst
 Times still succeed the former.

Then be not coy, but use your time,
 And while ye may, go marry;
For having lost but once your prime,
 You may for ever tarry.

-------

And just in case we, oldies think that it's all over, listen to the words of Rumi:

Passion makes the old medicine new:
Passion lops off the bough of weariness.
Passion is the elixer that renews:
How can there be weariness
When passion is present?
Oh, don't sigh heavily from fatigue:
Seek passion, seek passion, seek passion!

--Rumi, Mathnawi VI, 4302-4304

Heart of Heart

2006-03-13T12:03:00.000-08:00

My young friend, mctwists, suffered a loss yesterday, when his fiend and classmate, Stephanie, lost control in the rain, as she was driving to work, and died, instantly. What tragedy when any life is taken; but when one so young departs, it becomes almost incomprehensible. One moment the heart is ticking, the mind is working, the next, that light is gone.

Here's part of what mctwists (Ravi) just sent me:

The Pupil asks: 'At whose wish does the mind sent forth proceed on its errand? At whose command does the first breath go forth? At whose wish do we utter this speech? What god directs the eye, or the ear?'

The Teacher replies: 'It is the ear of the ear, the mind of the mind, the speech of speech, the breath of breath, and the eye of the eye. When freed (from the senses) the wise, on departing from this world, become immortal.'

-Kena Upanishad

Ah, Snow!

2006-03-12T08:07:00.000-08:00

Cold outside, but the fire inside is warm.
Welcome to my blizzard!

Flower, regarded.

2006-03-11T19:10:00.000-08:00

We WILL have tea in the afternoon someday,

and a glass of the sweetest of sherry in the evening

and get groggy because we're talking the way sisters talk

on my velvet green futon

deep, deep into the night,

until it becomes the morning

and you will fall into a peaceful sleep

with your hair matted all around your face

and your mouth slightly open

gurgling soft happy snoring sighs

and I will cover you with the afghan I made

a long time ago

before I ever met you

but I knew you a long time

before then

and stroke your hair back

from your face

and rest my hand there

and place my head

so close to yours

we breathe together

while I drift off

before dawn.

--Shining Dawn

Without judgment

2006-03-10T21:55:00.000-08:00

A kept flower, withered, must feel this way
Despondent, and numb, shocked, hoping for that which brings life.

Refreshment far away, a thirst, if only I could drink in the love which you withhold for fear of love itself.

The distant sun, a memory, a root struggles to etch itself through parched soil that has no give… groping like a lover for it’s beloved.

Memories of fertile days, annihilated. Just as well. They had to die.
Freedom in the sun, joy of being, love of life, it’s roots planted in a clay jar captive in a dank basement, it’s soil parched and head now bent.

The hope or dream of a caring eye, to move the flower and wash it’s roots and plant it afresh, too much to hope for...now. Hope had to die.

Yes, I have feet, that move, regardless, there are requirements for the human soul, none the less than that of a flower disregarded..

Blessing Place

2006-03-10T02:10:00.000-08:00

My breath, my blood, my spirit blent with One
Whilst daybreak woke to brilliant beck'ning sun
Still left my Home, the place where blessings live.

With haste my reckless intellect far-gone;
Without a backward glance I took my leave
And turned breath, blood, and spirit from the One.

I scorned the Hand that lifted to revive,
Set my cold heart as if it were a stone
Yet longed for Holy ground where blessings live.

I fin'lly lost each war I thought I'd won.
My heart lie broken, weary and bereaved
With breathless pose, blood spent, and spirit gone.

At last I'd fallen ready to receive
That Grace as bright as on the day I'd flown--
And viewed, with hope the place where blessings live.

When mortal men declare this journey done
Consider not that I was deign to give
My breath, my blood, my spirit bent toward One:
Memorial to this place where blessings live.

--Pamela Dawn

Gatherings

2006-03-09T09:49:00.000-08:00

Indigenous women spend much of the autumn season—the harvest—gathering, drying and storing seeds—foodstuff for the pending winter weather and planting material for springtime sowing--calculated survival, a skill women have been practicing and perfecting since time on this planet began.

Winter is a time to rest, to lay low, wait. I have been waiting for this waiting season for quite some time now. It seems the gathering season has extended itself out on my calendar for over two years.

At the start of this gathering season, my husband, Dee and I had been married three years (it was the second time for both of us) and we had attempted from our beginnings as a couple at the last chance at conceiving a child together. I had been pregnant three times before, two of those pregnancies viable, blessing me with beautiful daughters. My last pregnancy was over eighteen years past and the idea of conception at 42 was dubious, at best. Also, Dee has diabetes which can cruelly beat the shit out of the male reproductive system. Still, we had hope It just didn’t seem fair that Dee would not have the chance to be a father, in his own right. Damn it! Given the chance, he would be such a good one.

So, full of hope and faith, we set out to beat the odds. We were convinced we could do it—after all we could be counted on in a crowd of congregants to lift our hands in witness of a miracle. Wouldn’t that be enough? Just to increase our chances a bit, we opted to play the reproductive roulette game of artificial insemination.

Four failed attempts later—each time literally flushing precious lifeblood down the toilet, we made the agonizing decision to forego further attempts. I was beginning to relate somewhat to the Holly Hunter character, Edwina in the Cohen brothers’ film, “Raising Arizona.” Upon finally realizing the dream of conception was simply that, a dream, Edwina’s husband Hi reported that “Edwina’s insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase.”

We resigned ourselves to the notion of practicing parenthood in alternative ways; improving our relationship with my already grown children, welcoming neighbor children into our yard and home, volunteering with the youth groups of our city and church, doting on our nieces and nephews, and someday our grandchildren. Those who have played out this routine know it just isn’t the same and it’s performed on the backdrop of heartbreaking disappointment.

But the Universe wasn’t finished strewing seeds across my pathways for the gathering.

About the same time that we had turned in our conceptual letters of resignation, my oldest daughter informed us that she had successfully conceived and that she would be keeping her baby. I was not over-pleased, the sting of my recent failures still inflicting bitter pain and due to the appearance that she would be raising her baby alone. It certainly affected the way I handled the gathering of that seed.

In retrospect, I realize and accept that it was not seed for my gathering. On the other hand the situation was more complicated than dividing and compartmentalizing problems into baskets labeled “mine” and “someone else’s.” This was my daughter, formerly estranged and arriving at my door desperately needing her mother. What could I do? I’m her mother and I’m a gatherer. I collected her across my threshold, sowed seeds of new hope in anticipation of my first grandchild and awaited the pending harvest—every effort exerted to that end.

As an experienced gardener, I ought to have known better—harvest rarely yields exactly what one expects and it is NEVER an end. The “unexpected” was that after a seven month absence from her life, my daughter’s boyfriend reappeared—literally at the delivery room. Within three weeks time my daughter and granddaughter were whisked away amid the shattered hulls of my expectations and dreams.

But, contrary to the “Raising Arizona” line, I discovered that there were seeds sown of which I had forgotten that did find purchase and had grown. One of the sweetest was actually not one of my gathering or planting—it was the fruit of the seed of forgiveness that my ex-husband had sown in his own heart. It came to fruition the moment our granddaughter was born. As we gazed together at the miracle, my ex-husband quietly slipped his arm around my waist offering me his support and approval. No words, but it was a most beautiful gift—a cornucopia of reconciliation that has given me the encouragement to plant seeds of good will toward my granddaughter’s father.

I proudly watch my daughter mother her child but I am vigilantly and often too critically observant of the fathering. The seeds of forgiveness have transcended my failings as an impatient gardener in this area of my life and I am pleased with the growth I see, in spite of my inclination to judge and condemn. Materially, life is hard for that little family, but my granddaughter is happy in the love of both her parents and I am satisfied that the seeds I once doubted have fallen on good (I dare not say fertile) soil.

And I can do nothing else but what I have been doing all along these past two years—gather more seeds.

Recently, I discovered the seeds of creativity gently wrapping little tendrils of their roots around my life—in my renewed attempts at writing and a newly discovered interest in making wire jewelry that goes beyond the simple stringing of beads and which blesses the lives of those I love.

I am in the process of reconfiguring my field of faith and planting fresh new seeds. It is a wild field of wheat and tares which won’t be plucked out or burned. Who knows but that I might use the twine of such as those to weave baskets—containers for future seed gatherings.

I have been blessed with the seeds of new relationships that are peeking their vestiges above the crisp ground promising to blossom like the daffodils and crocuses that greet me on my afternoon walks. And I look to the wonderful man with whom I have shared my plantings these past five years and I can do naught but smile. He is a sturdy perennial ever offering regenerated seeds of the constancy of his love.

These past two weeks, the Universe manifested the vision of my gatherings and literally dropped pods of those Kentucky Coffee Bean trees across my path—confirming the validity of my gatherings (see the “Not Made of Wood” posting earlier this month). And just yesterday, almost immediately after my departure from the Kazeon Center (the zen sangha in Salt Lake City), the auspice of one of many seeds of faith springing in my heart—a single buckeye dropped directly in my path. A sign? I don’t know but I really think I’ve completely skipped over winter, there is no waiting with spring so soon to begin—fields cleared and I’ve got baskets of gathered seeds to sow.

My 2nd loveletter

2006-03-09T07:49:00.000-08:00

My 2nd loveletter

I would like to take a few quotations from Karen Armstrong’s book, The Spiral Staircase, to add here to show my appreciation for her journey, offerings, insights, and most of all, for the telling of her story that penetrates my heart more than words can say.

In her story I find my own hopes, struggles, and questions. I find In her story, compassion for; her life, and for my own. This deeper understanding of compassion for my self, deepens my compassion for the world.

Her book is so well written intellectually, and heartfelt. To find a mere passage is difficult. So I will begin with this one that describes ecstasy. For me it has been a struggle, once living in this place of ecstasy, and then at a loss to experience it, and unable to find it once again, knowing somehow it is the way in which I am to live, yet not understanding exactly what it is, or how it happens to be that emptiness occurs, and we are filled with divine movement.

Karen’s research has been more successful than my own. I care to understand and to have the grace to act according to the perfection of the universe, which I believe is our most natural way of living.

Quoting from The Spiral Staircase:

“The Greek, ekstasis, it will be recalled, simply means,” standing outside.” And transcendence means,” climbing above or beyond.”
This does not necessarily imply an exotic state of consciousness. For years I had longed to get to know God, to ascend to a higher plane of being, but I had never considered at length what it was you had to climb from. All the traditions tell us, one way or another, that we have to leave behind our inbuilt selfishness, with it’s greedy fears and cravings. We are, the great spiritual writers insist, most fully ourselves when we give ourselves away, and it is egotism that holds us back from that transcendent experience that has been called God, Nirvana, Brahman, or the Tao.

Further she communicates that she had assumed God was an objective fact, and approached God using the same kind of logical reflection that she had employed in her secular life. Rational analysis was useless for approaching God, and as a result of the empirical reasoning of the 16th and 17th centuries, Western people began talking of God as though he were an objective demonstrable fact. (I am paraphrasing). “The more intuitive disciplines of mythology and mysticism were discredited.” She says. This was the cause of many of the religious problems of our day, including my own.”

The research Karen has done is invaluable to the world today. She brings a gift of clarity and understanding in a story that cleaves to your own heart and soul, a story of the necessity of understanding and compassion. The historical depth of this understanding that she clarifies leads to a freedom of heart.

Romeow, aka Puddy, fast asleep, and unaware the rain has stopped at least momentarily. Outside my window, crows are hobbling around in the yard, apple trees are in bloom, and some of my ground covers are blooming, too. It is overcast here,
(ya think?) but the Sound is in sight and Whidbey Island beyond. I think I need a ferry ride across!

Love Letters, First

2006-03-08T13:55:00.000-08:00

Love Letters

No explanation at the moment, I just know that at this time, I must write love letters.

Let me explore how life is living me, because in my hasty judging (the root of all discontent), the judgment we make and others make of how our lives are lacks insight and compassion, the breadth of life.

For a long time now I have been doing nothing that the "world" values, and as a result I don’t value what I am doing either.
I should know better than this, but on myself, as most of us are, I am too harsh. How crazy this is, to value what others value, create what others create, avoid what others avoid. (The Tao) This is life living me, I must celebrate, THIS.

How many times have I said that it is not in what we do, that we have our value, but in what we are that gives us value? Yet these words are designed to comfort someone else, and I haven’t applied them to me.

That I admire Karen Armstrong’s life, her writing, (spiral Staircase, others) that I can see the hand of the omnificent God creating her life, through the struggles she imparts in her book, and I have upon my desk Wayne Dyers book, Manifest your Destiny, I can plainly see these are their lives, and we each, are being lived in a different way. No one life is better than another, that is just another judgement that keeps us from the truth.

My words may not be published, I may seem to touch but a few souls, yet isn't that is impossible, to touch a few souls, for we are one and what one does, is progress and experience for all.

Judging is a human thought form, not a divine one, and all lives are expressions of divinity, all lives are as real, as non real, violent lives, easy lives, struggling lives, we all are that life which has validation just in being.
So today let me say how life is living me, for in this very simple act of acknowledging this, I will find my own acceptance, and connection with the divinity that I cannot see that, I am, always.

Last night I made lunch for Mike. I made 2 delicious roast beef sandwiches, with Muenster cheese and mayonnaise. I included a nice small bowl of home cooked pinto beans in one of my pottery bowls that I made with my own hands on my wheel (that I think I waste if I am not doing it all the time). I sealed cottage cheese and sweet pickles into a plastic container and wrapped it with wrap, and added a granny smith apple.

I packed it all in a plastic bag open in the fridge so he would see it first things this morning. I knew if I was not up, he would make a latte with the machine I purchased for simple pleasures, and noticed my mind condemning me for not always being up at 5 to make his breakfast; for not always packing a lunch, for not making more of a life making pots or money, for so many failures.

I am aware that even those who make millions have to distract themselves with buying to escape the mind that is always judging and dictating, and hurting each of us. I have few of these indulgences to escape myself, I live closely to myself each day, and I am not always easy to take.. but, I want to thank my mere, and complete being, for my small contributions, acts, for my being lived in whatever way the universe decides to live me, and forget what minds have to say of this, for minds are just making a mess of the truth of our divinity.

Puddy slept with me and crawled under the covers and curled up next to my heart, where he could hear life beating, and feel the warmth of this life. As if to say,” I missed you and want to know you are really here alive and close by again, your life is important to my own.” Life is living him, my dear fuzzy kitty, my Romeow. He sits close by as I write, beside me on a chair on a cushion, or like now on a cushion near the window, right by my desk. He always seeks me out, whatever room I inhabit, he is there, He comes to the door to greet me when I arrive home, he comes into the house and finds me wherever I am and,” mrow mrow,” he says, “ I am home,” he appreciates me, just for me.

Responsibility, discipline, Hot topics, lol what responsibility do I have? Is it really the way the world looks at being responsible that is truth? Or is that sense of being responsible really what keeps us from manifesting all that is available to us at all times. Coming to grips with my divinity is my responsibility, if I have any. Remember now, responsibility is the ability to respond. I have that!

I sip a home made latte from a large beautiful bowl like cup made by potter I just met, and I appreciate him for this one cup of life he has made, and for the being who shared a few stolen moments with me while working to talk of making pots, and art.

Appreciation, what is more important than that?

What can be more fulfilling than just knowing you’re being lived, and that whatever form it takes is divine, although people misunderstand and ask questions about topics such as cruelty, we all add to that by believing we are separate, when all there is, is love.

When I appreciate my own world, my own,” seeming self, without “doing,” I am realizing the truth of my divinity. Inner judgment ultimately stands in the way of compassion and peace on this level of reality we refer to as; time, space and earth. I appreciate everyone for his or her life, and small contributions, and I am certain everyone, even the most hardened person is being lived and is divine. I am being lived by love, “ I am,” love’s expression in this, “time dream,” we share.

This is my letter for love for today.

Lynn, thank you for your feedback and edits.

Apologies to Tamarika

2006-03-05T20:20:00.000-08:00

Her blog, In and out of Confidence, I just had to do this...because I realize I move in and out of consciousness. More later...Love, sherry